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Marrying an Other whatever the Form

Reframing and Extending the Understanding of Marriage


Marrying an Other whatever the Form
Religious context
Recognized criteria of marriage
Marriage more inclusively understood
Marriage more inclusively understood: commentary
Questionable criteria of marriage
Subtler insights into the "chemistry" of the marriage bond
Ionic marriage versus Covalent marriage?
Bonding with an "other" articulated through the language of molecular bonding
Complementary languages required for articulation of human bonding
Extending understanding of the "other" as a potential partner
Extending the family of "family values" -- wisely
Enabling the other to be otherwise
Conclusion
Cardinal numbers in Papal selection as a mathematical recreation
References

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Introduction

The understanding of relationships with an "other" is central to highly controversial debate at this time. The debate focuses in particular on "same-sex marriage". This is considered especially questionable by various religions, most explicitly those of Abrahamic tradition and most especially by the Catholic Church.

The question here is whether the nature of relationships with any "other" can be reframed in the light of the variety of understandings of "marriage". The issue is whether this reframing effectively exists already to a degree, both intuitively and in practice. The "same-sex" controversy could therefore be understood as focused unfruitfully on a very particular understanding of the "other" whom it is possible to marry and the manner in which that marriage is honoured and celebrated.

It is argued here that a person may be variously considered by society to be "married to" a wide variety of "others", possibly including: a house, a farm, a club, an automobile, a hobby, a garden, a teacher, an occupation, a friend, a pet animal, a cause, etc. A Google search of "married to the " is indicative (132 million hits). A cause may indeed be "espoused", for example.

In each case the bond is recognized to have characteristics of "marriage" -- and may even be held to be so strong as to compete for fidelity with any conventional marriage, as with a person "married to" an all-absorbing hobby, despite the concerns of any spouse. Within such a context, any controversy regarding conventional marriage derives from what could be named as "definitional game-playing", selectively adjusting the criteria of marriage to honour (or deprecate) particular forms under particular conditions. As argued here, in practice the bond associated with the sense of being married takes a wider variety of forms in its potential engagement with one or more "others" -- and may well be recognized as such already.

This exploration follows from earlier efforts (Transcending Simplistic Binary Contractual Relationships: what is hindering their exploration? 2012; An Approach to Systematic Classification of Interpersonal Relationships, 1978). The last was subtitled as "essential to alternative life styles, social and personal transformation".

Current approaches to marrying an animal
  • in an entry on Human-Animal marriage, Wikipedia offers historical examples in the case of horses, dogs, goats, and snakes, noting separately the incidence of zoophilia, namely sexual activity between human and other animals
  • a man has unofficially married his cat after the animal fell ill and vets told him it might not live much longer (German man 'marries' his dying cat, BBC News, 3 May 2010)
  • critics of same-sex human marriage have suggested that it opens the way to marriage to a horse (Gay Marriage Law Could Produce Man-Horse Nuptials, The Huffington Post, 15 May 2010). However few would doubt that the bond which some have with a horse may be as deep as that which they may experience with a human.
Such examples, as extremes, obscure the subtly profound quality of the bond which many have with one or more animals over an extended period -- a bond whose recognition by civil or religious "marriage" may be as unnecessary as it is for deep bonds between many humans.

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